1 Triage your worries

Limit the time you spend worrying about things that you have no control over. There are two distinct types of worry – worrying about a real problem, or worrying about something that is hypothetical. Ask yourself, is this real and something that is happening right now? Would someone else agree this is a problem? If the answer is yes, you can then move onto problem-solving. But if the worry is hypothetical, then try writing it down in great detail. It can help you get to the heart of the worry, the underlying goal or value that underpins it.

2 Face your fears

The only way to find out if there are monsters under the bed is to have a good look under the bed! If you have a hypothetical worry about something that might happen, writing about it in great detail can help you realise it’s just a thought and it’s not real.

3 Be honest

We rarely tell people the details of our worries – we might say to our partner ‘I’m worried about the changes at work’ but we wouldn’t say, ‘I’m worried my new boss will think I’m no good, sack me and then I’ll never get a job again.’ But being honest can help you understand what you’re really afraid of.

4 Avoid labelling

Don’t call yourself a worrier. Worrying is something you do, it’s not a personality trait. It is something you can control.

5 Schedule worry time

If you find worrying is distracting or draining you, it may help to try ear-mark a specific time in the day (around 15 minutes) for worrying, then when worries come up, mentally ‘park’ them until worry time. You’ll be far more likely to think about a problem in a proactive way if you haven’t spent all day and all night worrying about it.

6 Keep pen and paper by your bed

If worries wake you in the night, writing them down can help you go back to sleep.

7 Use mindfulness

Regular mindfulness exercises can help you tune out the background noise of worries, according to a recent study. Try simply closing your eyes and focusing on your attention on your breathing for a minute. Then breathe in to a count of eight and out to a count of 10, for several minutes.

8 Find a grounding object

Find something that reminds you of a calm or happy time – like a smooth pebble from a beach – and keep it with you all the time. Knowing it’s there will make you feel safer and feeling it can help distract you from worry.

READ MORE – Why We Worry