Our moods are like an internal weather pattern – sometimes they change daily, sometimes from hour to hour. Thanks to our built-in psychological immune system, most negative moods lift of their own accord, restoring our emotional equilibrium. But when moods feel out of control, or they impact on relationships or general quality of life, it’s time to investigate the cause. Moods can be a barometer of general health and wellbeing, nudging us to pay attention to imbalances or to make some overdue changes.
Here are the most common troublesome mood patterns, the typical causes, and what you can do to tame them.

Persistent low mood
What it feels like: You feel flat, lethargic and less sociable than usual, and every day life can feel like a struggle.
Key triggers: Ruminating (mentally rehashing the past or worrying about the future) is a common cause of low mood. Lifestyle factors can also take their toll – poor quality sleep and daily drinking are classic mood saboteurs and often go hand-in-hand. You can also suffer from low mood if you’ve got a vocal inner critic – do you say things to yourself that you’d never dream of saying to a friend?
Mood management strategy: Exercise is the closest thing we’ve got to a magic pill for low mood. A 2005 study found that 35 minutes of brisk walking five times a week had a significant effect. It’s a good idea to also keep alcohol to a minimum until your mood improves, and prioritise sleep. Try scheduling ‘worry’ time – 15 minutes at a specific time of the day. If you catch yourself ruminating, say ‘stop’, then mentally park the thought until official worry time. And above all, learn to be kind, supportive and encouraging to yourself – as a bonus, self-compassion also boosts self-confidence. If your symptoms don’t improve, see your GP as you may be suffering from depression.

Rollercoaster moods
What it feels like: Sometimes you can feel like your mood changes on an hourly basis – when all goes to plan you feel upbeat and optimistic, but the smallest setback can send your mood spiralling downwards. You may even joke or worry about being ‘bipolar’, but in bipolar disorder, episodes of extremes highs and lows tend last several weeks.
Key triggers: Perfectionists can be vulnerable to rollercoaster moods because they are often black and white thinkers – you have a row with your partner and you immediately think you’re about to split up. If you’re a perfectionist, your life can be full of ‘shoulds’ and things you feel you must do rather than you want to do, and you tend to judge your self-worth on what you do, not who you are.
Mood management strategy: Challenge ‘all or nothing’ thinking with evidence – are you really useless at everything or always messing up? Gratitude exercises, such as writing down five things you’re grateful for in your life, and the part you played in making them happen, can help give you perspective. A growth mindset is also a good antidote to perfectionism, seeing life as a series of experiments from which you learn and grow, rather than a series of tests that you either pass or fail. And for an instant reality check when you feel your mood spiralling, ask yourself how much this will matter one year from now.

Hiding how you feel
What it feels like: Your standard response to ‘How are you?’ is ‘Fine’ even if inside, you’re all churned up. You’re either out of touch with your moods, or deeply uncomfortable about showing them. You may come across as withdrawn or sulky at times, and occasionally, your suppressed anger explodes, much to the surprise of those around you who had no idea you were upset.
Key triggers: Dissociating from your moods can be a defence learned in childhood if you grew up in a family where strong emotions were discouraged, or you had an ‘exploder’ for a parent so you never learned how to express your emotions in a safe way.
Mood management strategy: Keeping track of your moods in a journal or on an app can help you tune into your feelings and provide insight into your personal triggers. Mindfulness can also help you explore your internal ‘weather pattern’ and learn to notice and sit with your moods. Experiment with owning up to your moods with the people who care about you, by using ‘I’ statements – eg ‘I feel really angry about what happened last night’ rather than ‘You made me so angry last night.’

Snappy and irritable
What it feels like: At times, you can feel like you’ve been hijacked by an evil gremlin – you’re grumpy and irritable with everyone around you. You may even lose control and completely blow your top. When the mood passes and you feel yourself again, it’s hard to believe you got so wound up.
Key triggers: Hormonal upheaval due to PMS or perimenopause is often behind irritability and may also trigger sensitivity to noise, so even normal conversations around you wind you up. But snappy moods can also be a symptom of high stress levels and feeling overwhelmed or out of control.
Mood management strategy: Get some herbal help if your irritability is hormone-related – agnus castus may help with PMS and a magnesium or phyto-oestrogen supplement with perimenopausal symptoms. Practising a relaxation technique throughout the day can help keep your ‘stress thermostat’ down so you’re more resilient to daily hassles. Try 7-11 breathing; find a quiet space and spend five or ten minutes breathing in for a count of seven and out for a count of 11. If you’re feeling overloaded, give yourself permission to put yourself first for a while and take a look at how you can declutter your diary. And prioritise sleep – tiredness and irritation is a dangerous combination.